Africa pwns RP on MDGs

Some African nations have overtaken the Philippines in the race to the Millennium Development Goals. You know, stuff like lowering maternal deaths and fighting AIDS so we won’t be so mired in poverty.

According to the MDG Report Card, the top 20 countries that have made the most overall progress on the MDGs are: Benin, Mali, Ethiopia, Gambia, Malawi, Vietnam, Uganda, Nepal, India, Cambodia, Bangladesh, Honduras, Mauritania, Ghana, China, Burkina Faso, Rwanda, Nicaragua, Guatemala, and Togo.

Rwanda, man! Unless we had a systematic culling of our population based on ethnicity last night, I don’t think we have any excuse.

Pacquiao now a full-fledged politico

Fresh from a 10-day crash course on how to be a congressman, Sarangani Rep. Manny Pacquiao seems to have learned the basics of politics quite well. He has bolted losing presidential candidate Sen. Manuel Villar’s Nacionalista Party for the Liberal Party.

This, after coming out in a TV ad during the campaign season sucker punching LP’s Benigno Aquino III for his lack of legislative accomplishments.

Now that Aquino is President-elect, Pacquiao is moving to the winning team because Aquino ‘means well and it’ll be good for the country.’

He also said that he moved to the LP because he wants to make sure that the influx of projects in Sarangani Province will be continuous.

Well, basta sports lang, you know.

Justice secretary to prosecutor: NO U!

(Acting) Justice Secretary says it’s lawyer Harry Roque’s fault that Suwaib Upham, said to be a key witness for the prosecution in the Maguindanao Massacre, was left unprotected.

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Key witness in Maguindanao Massacre is murdered

Truly an epic fail:

“He was supposed to be one of our strongest witnesses,” prosecutor Harry Roque told Agence France-Presse. “He saw, and participated in, the killings and could have directly named in court those involved.”

And apparently this wasn’t the first case:

His death comes two months after an uncle of another witness was also shot and killed, in what authorities said was part of a plan to intimidate those speaking out against the Ampatuan clan.

A plan. The dastardly villains have a plan. In the meantime, is this case even progressing?

Filipino nurses in US fired for speaking Tagalog

Three nurses and a secretary were fired from Bon Secours Hospital in Baltimore, Maryland in April for speaking in Tagalog.

They were fired for violating a policy to speak only English in the hospital’s emergency room.

“All it takes is just one word. That can be a greeting, a remark or even the name of a Filipino dish. Based on this rule, you could say ‘bagoong’ and lose your job“

Bagoong! Bagoong!

The employees have complained of arbitrary termination, adding that the rule prohibiting them from speaking in a language other than English violated their rights.

Now you can get mad, Philippines.

RP No.51 on Failed States Index

From Foreign Policy

A dubious world record: the Philippines is 51st on Foreign Policy’s Failed States Index, slightly better off than Bolivia and the West Bank (sort of not a state, I guess).

51. PHILIPPINES
Score: 87.1

Democratic elections will see power transfer from President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo to her successor, Benigno S. Aquino III, at the end of June. Despite booming foreign investment, poverty is the dominant reality for the country’s population. Here, a child walks between shantytown blocks built on tombs.

As deputy presidential spokesman Gary Olivar says, it’s the numbers that count.

Man in Manila stabbed over “Nobody”

A man was killed in Manila this week for butchering “Nobody,” the Korean pop song that also served as Caloocan mayor Recom Echiverri’s election platform.

Just minutes before he was stabbed, Viray and his friends were drinking at the bar when they decided to sing the Wonder Girls’ hit song.

Their rendition, however, irked another group of drinkers at a nearby table who made their displeasure known by shouting them down.

Shouting soon turned to stabbing, as usually happens, and Viray ended up stabbed in the face and neck.

Tragic as that is, it also invites the question: why do grown-ass men in their cups always think it a good idea to sing like girls?

Slain journalist not actually a journalist

Relax, Reporters Without Borders! Nestor Bedolido, the journalist shot six times in Davao Sur was just a regular guy according to the local police chief.

“He is not a practicing journalist, but is a propagandist. He is working for some political personalities in the province”

That somehow makes his death less tragic, I guess. The guy was practically asking for it, not being a practicing journalist. You know who else was a propagandist? Dr. Jose Rizal. Things didn’t end well for him either.

Not only that, Bedolido, and the other ‘practicing’ journalists in this country are just victims of both a brutal culture and bad luck, says deputy presidential spokesman Gary Olivar.

So shut up about chilling effects and cultures of impunity already.

UPDATE: DepEd Fears The Wrath Of God, Backs Down on Sex Education

MRI of sexual juxtaposed with the Shroud of Turin

Sex, No! Jesus, Yes!

Outdated moral values trumps progressive education.  The Department of Education has indefinitely postponed the integration of Sex Education into the school curriculum, pending consultation with the Inquisition Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines.

Valisno clarified that the deferment was not a reaction to Monday’s filing of a class suit by Ang Kapatiran Party (AKP) before the Regional Trial Court of Quezon City seeking to stop the department from teaching sex education in public and private elementary and high schools.

Sure it’s not.

Sperm Whale found off Davao Oriental

Photo by Journalist SARX LANOS

A 40-foot sperm whale weighing 20 tons was found off the coast of Davao Oriental today according to Journalist SARX LANOS, who sends us daily dispatches.

Environment officials are looking for a place to bury the whale as well as for equipment to bring it there.

Dr. Lea Jiminez of the Davao Oriental State College of Science and Technology had this to say to Philippine Coast Guard officers who dragged the whale to shore:

“Glad you were able to recover and secure the whale, this is very important event as our waters of Davao Oriental can have the biggest sea mammal in the world, this is world record.”

"World Record"

(thx, Journalist SARX LANOS)