Francis Escudero, Sorcerer Supreme

Forget Chief Justice Reynato Puno’s Moral Force Movement. What we need, this ad for Sen. Francis Escudero tells us, is magic.

It’s actually, pretty cool. If Pres. Manuel Quezon patrolled the streets by hailing random cabs and checking whether the drivers charged him the correct fare*, then why not a president who walks the streets in a hoodie and does magic tricks for street urchins?

And, come on, guys. We’ve tried people power, we’ve tried coups, we’ve tried honest elections. Maybe what we really need to get rid of traditional politics is some sorcery.

By the hoary hosts of Hoggoth, vote for me!

By the hoary hosts of Hoggoth, vote for me!

*My old elementary school social studies textbook says so.

(thanks for the tip, FreeSince09!)

21 Comments

  1. Eh di ba lahat naman ng politiko magaling mag magik?

    Yung persa sa pork barrel nawawala na lang parang magik. Tapos yung pera sa bulsa nila, dumadami na lang parang magik din.

  2. Leave it to CHIZ to solve the country’s problems with HOPES and DREAMS. That’s what he did in his district in SORSOGON, which is why sorsogon HATES him. Good luck VOLDEMORT.

  3. Senator, You are a prime example of ALL BARK and NO BITE. Please, just return to being a Private lawyer, you will do better there. Elected Officials are supposed to “WORK” which means “MOVE” not talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk and argue and talk. You don’t belong in any government.

  4. @pantlesscat: pretty obscure reference there, pantless. Plus one.

    @ubernards: hehehe. good point. pero yung magic na ganun, hindi umiilaw at walang special effects.

  5. @freesince09: you’re on a roll!

    @joyful: it’s pretty much par for the course for political ads, though. In terms of talking about platforms and other boring stuff.
    But, dude! Magic!

  6. All right, I’ve heard ok stuff from his people. Still, I’m not convinced to vote for this guy…. Can ANYONE tell me something good about him

  7. i don’t like this guy. puro salita lang to si escudero. wala syang ibang magawa kundi mag comment sa ginagawa nang iba. e sya mismo wlang nagawa para sa bayan. lol..

  8. @FreeSince09: Well, he’s in the opposition. Which doesn’t really mean anything anymore.

    If you’re looking for a platform, the closest I can give you is:lower taxes, lower power rates through the Wholesale Electric Spot Market (I’m not sure how this works, really), less discretion and red tape on government affairs, higher agricultural output, and better schools.

    Still pretty sweeping, but that’s what I got from a cursory glance at his press releases.

  9. Sabagay, sa ganitong paraan, may dahilan bakit nawawala yung pera sa pork barrel – kasi iginamit para sa special effects ng magik.

  10. Best platform is:
    Lowering electricity costs by allowing “3 or more” independent power distributors to gain some competition for the monopolizing LOPEZes.

    Obligating Jobless Filipinos to Either get jobs or pursue to finish whatever they did not finish (i.e. Secondary Schooling, Tertiary Schooling, etc). Then with the help of concerned government agencies, should not be allowed jobless for more than 2 weeks. The government must provide them with jobs and they must comply to any job if they cannot get one on their own.

    Obligating Policemen (esp. Investigators) to REALLY do their FREAKING JOBS (Might consider to Obligate them to have decent College degrees and training because they SUCK). They Don’t know how to do their jobs, they only know racketeering.

    Pressure Congress in the First 30 days of office to pass a law: 1) Lowering taxes for Hybrid to pure electric vehicles, 2) Banning the importation of REJECTED or second-hand Diesel engines or if not practical, must have compulsory Exhaust filters that reduce at least 98% soot emissions.

    Totally Finish Insurgency problems with the REDS, because it is the only way to totally promote tourism.

    Have All lawmakers to draft a job description for everyone, Executive bodies, Judicial and Legislators, so the people will know who to really look for with their problems and whoever is responsible. This is to lessen the STUPID politicking clout that has been eating our country.

    Suspend all government property developments for subdivisions and create more FARMLANDS.

    Bring back support for FARMERS.

    This is only a mere fraction of what we need to progress, question is, do any of you Candidates have the balls to implement these? We DARE you.

  11. I forgot to say one more, for the mean time:

    We have what we call separation between the CHURCH and the STATE. So why is it that you STATESMEN cannot make your own decision? Why? Because you are all bloody cowards, you are all afraid of the CHURCH, they have been extremely solid in blocking the reproductive health bill and they are hold in the balls the statesmen blocking it. We are overpopulated and 80% are UNEDUCATED because of that. to Hell with the CHURCH Gentlemen and Ladies. Do what is right for the country, IT IS YOUR JOB and BLOODY RESPONSIBILITY. The country NEEDS performances from appointed ones, NOT PRAYERS.
    LIMIT GREED, because it is impossible to ELIMINATE it.

  12. It’s BAD enough that he has no respectable qualifications, MAGDALO group had to swoop in and endorse the man. Sheesh, di man lang sila nagiisip. Kaya sila unsuccessful, puro kabog ng dibdib ang sinusunod di utak.

  13. Jun you made a very good point BUT if you want something done then you had better do it yourself.

    Those people have the guts and the drive to get what they want while the common people just don’t want to do anything. Have you noticed the attitude of Filipinos today? They just accept all the corruption going on around them without batting an eyelash!

    STOP the brain drain! I hate Filipinos who have given up on their countries and instead of using their talents to help our country grow their giving it away because of the almighty dollar.

    Our country is very rich in natural resources. We don’t need tourist! What we need are able bodied Filipinos working the land. There’s miles and miles of undeveloped farmlands. Filipinos just think that they deserved better.

    The Philippines is part of the Pacific Ring of Fire. Start building Geothermal Power Plants! Our electric bill is just second to Japan. We can’t afford such high rates.

    Stop people denuding our rain forests. Build dams! Do everything to prevent the yearly flooding! This latest disaster is not something new, far from it.

    Our “Bahala na” attitude is our greatest sin. Our Colonial Mentality our downfall.

    Right now. I would favor anarchy just to wake up our country from the slump it seem to be stuck into.

  14. @Dante: I am doing something brother, I just gave some makati cops a piece of my mind. I also gave some of my Kaprobinsiyas a hell of a sermon, one by one, of course. But I am only one, others must follow. God speed.

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