Archive for the ‘gonzo journalism’ Category

But what?

Here’s a cheerfully confusing Father’s Day headline from the Inquirer: “Girl survives massacre but finds a father and a name.” But what, Inquirer? Call me a stickler for words meaning what they do but doesn’t it suggest that ‘yeah, the girl survived the massacre and then more shit happened’?

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Metro News: Gay alerts people to freak accident

Well, all right. The actual headline on ABS-CBN news was “Army sergeant dies in freak accident in Taguig,” but there was nothing really freaky about what happened. A guy has an argument with his wife, walks out, and is run over by a black van. It was surprising, but not freaky by any standard. If [...]

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Honorable Secretary Boy Abunda?

We are not such snobs as to turn our noses up at the prospect of showbiz gossip talk show host Boy Abunda joining the second Aquino Administration. As one of our commenters has pointed out, writing off someone just because he’s from show business is just about as intelligent as believing someone is great just [...]

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‘Sexism’ sinks Sen. Santiago’s survey scores

The country’s fightingest senator says that she has been doing poorly on pre-election surveys because people might look for her on the ballot under ‘Santiago’ instead of  her preferred ‘Defensor-Santiago.’

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Greenpeace anti-coal video says nothing at all

This Greenpeace video teaches us about the evils of coal-fired power plants by telling us nothing at all. Listen, Greenpeace, we know that saving the Earth is important. But surely you can send that message without resorting to the environmentalist version of  ”or face the wrath of God.” I’m just saying.

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CNN Hero of the Year Doesn’t Get the Girl

Local media was agog (as much as it could be under the circumstances) when CNN Hero of the Year Efren Penaflorida admitted to courting actress and Encyclopedia Dramatica archenemy Angel Locsin. To no avail, it turns out, judging from his twitter stream.

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Metro News: Dealing with exes, how not to

A suave casanova in Bayombong, Nueve Vizcaya has been arrested for blackmailing an ex-girlfriend with nude photos in exchange for sex.

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Alfonso Castañeda,NV: SUV country

Alfonso Castañeda may just be a fourth-class municipality of Nueva Vizcaya province, but its officials ride around in first class. The municipal government may soon find itself under investigation by the Office of the Ombudsman for buying 18 sports utility vehicles worth 24 million pesos including two Toyota Fortuners, the SUV for douchebags. The purchases, [...]

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Go Philippines!: World’s Biggest Mango

It seems Team Philippines is in for a good year. The Guinness Book of World Records has certified a 3.5-kilogram mango from Iligan City as the world’s largest, beating a 2.4-kilo one from Canada. Said mango will be honored in separate resolutions at the House of Representatives and the Senate for proving that the Filipino [...]

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Too Soon? Gordon declares war on Noynoy

Call it a preemptive strike, or some sort of premature ejaculation, but the Indolent Indio received a press release from Bagumbayan Senator Richard Gordon pretty much telling Liberal Senator Benigno Aquino III to STFU.

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